Snapped Shot

Could it be? Is Fidel Castro really still alive?

According to his ardent followers in the press, he made a "live" appearance over the weekend, which is definitely spoken with the intent of fooling all of we unbelievers. The government newspaper, Juventud Rebelde, follows up with photographic evidence of this momentous occasion, which was repeated unquestionably by the Associated Press:



Of course, what do we really know about "Weekend At" Fidel's latest appearance?

Well, for starters, this photograph is not the appearance itself—Castro "appeared" via telephone on Thuggo Chavez's weekly radio program, which was broadcast from Che "Dead Commie" Guevara's monument in Cuba. Seriously: Chavez went through all of the effort to fly over there, and his hero doesn't even have the courtesy to actually appear in public (notice how Thuggo's broadcasting from a stage?) on the show?

This whole scenario reeks to high heaven.

Personally, I think the photograph above is a complete fraud:—Check out the difference in lighting between Castro's whole body (not just his skin, which could be explained as his frailty), and that of Thuggo Chavez. What do you suppose the odds are that the communist archipelago still can't figure out what to do post-Castro, and as a result, keeps having to prop up the legend of Castro to keep their dictatorial ways afloat?

No sign of our dancing duet yet. It seems that Chavez is stuck playing second fiddle at the moment.




¿Cómo interesando, no?

Here's some more wackiness from the Kooky Kommie Isle. While I don't see any obvious signs of photoshopping, the pictures by themselves are worth their weight in gold!



More kooky fun can be found following the break, and more Cuban speculation can be found over at La Contra Revolucíon. Continue reading »

Oh, the possibilities which could be wrought by a strategically-placed daisy cutter...



Cuba libre! Free Vietnam! (Duc, if you're still lurking here, I'd love to hear the translation for the second one!)

La Contra Revolucíon has been documenting the rather hilarious transformation of brutally-beloved dictator Fidel Castro into a blogger-of-sorts. Unlike we "real" bloggers, when Fidel says something, the worldwide press repeats it ipso facto. Most comical is the Miami Sun-Sentinel's attempt to get, as El Gusano puts it, "John Q. Cuban's" opinion on Castro's death hospital stay:

The Sun-Sentinel, trying to make a story out of a pile of bull crap, went out to interview the man on the street, Juan Q. Cuban , as it where. And bless them, they found a 33 year old construction worker named, get this ….., Ho Chi Ming Alvarez, (his brother Mao Tse Tung Alvarez wasn’t available)
...
Ho Chi Ming Alvarez…hahahahahahahaha

Thanks for the chuckle, Gusano!

Uhh, "Long Live Death?"

While it doesn't exactly make sense, it's the best way I can describe Fidel Castro's demise. After all, the island archipelago is currently playing the biggest game of "Weekend at Fidel's" I've ever seen. It does look like ol' Tracksuit seems to have "missed" today's festivities after all.

I dunno... maybe that's because he's still pushing up daisies?



Update: It looks like Fidel was healthy enough to "hop on" and write an article for Granma the day before May Day. Of course, without accompanying photographs, who's to say who really wrote the article. After all, there is no telling one dictatorial screed from another, is there?

Guess who was a no-show at Cuba's annual May Day parade this year? From REUTERS' chief propagandist-on-site, Claudia Daut:



Of course, Fidel's got a good 12 hours before the day's up, so who knows what might happen. Until he does show, though, you just know that there's a fresh, plus-sized waterfall of tears over in Caracas right about now...

As a bonus, I'll be doing my best to archive all of the Unhappy May Day celebrations beyond the fold! If Castro is a no-show, as I suspect he'll be, does that mean we can count him once again amongst the dead? Continue reading »

Hugo Chavez sure seems to enjoy slinging these letters around. It sure doesn't seem to be a good way of dispelling the notion that he's a Cuban Communist Stoolie, though...

It's as if the Cuban government exists for no reason other than to counter our constant speculation about Fidel Castro's demise. Not a day after questions were raised in the comments thread just referenced, the Cubans have released this high-resolution photograph of, well, I'll just call him "Fidel"—to "prove" to us that he's still "with" us.


It is nice to know that they're still in the business of "quashing" rumours. It's not like Cuba has any real needs to tend to, right?

Facial recognition experts, do your worst:

Is Fidel Castro back in good enough shape for the public spotlight again? Or have they just finished training his body double well enough to go out and start meeting people?


For more on the history of the Traditional Dictatorial Use of Body Doubles, be sure to see good old Wikipedia.

Wow, it looks like he really is still alive, though from the looks of it, he probably doesn't have long to live. (Of course, this could still be a "body double," not that dictators ever use those...)

Is this another sign of Fidel Castro's demise?


Update: Haha, I just noticed Roger Williams' little piece on Qaddafi -- Roger tells us via the comments in the Saturday edition that he much prefers the "Faux-Military" side of Moamar's closet to the pan-Arab one. While it's definitely more "dictatorial," I still prefer his more flamboyant outfits myself:


What can I say? The man is the apogee of fashion.

Surprise, surprise! Fidel Castro has popped up on fellow dictator Hugo Chavez's (who else?) radio show. Does this mean he's genuinely still not dead? Or is Hugo just dancing for the cameras yet again?

And, of course, who would forget the newest megalomaniac People's Representative to come to power in South America, who is clearly in agreement with the press as to who the world's biggest dictators are:


Clearly, Hugo seems to share a few speechwriters with the Democratic National Committee... It is interesting to note that during Hugo's recent photo op with Fidel, we didn't see any pictures come across the news wire of him actually arriving in Cuba, which is usually a staple of dictatorial travel. Could there really be something to the notion that the photos and video they showed are rebroadcasts of last year's get-together? Stranger things have happened, that's for sure...

One way or another, Fidel's toast. No doubt about it!